Fading
by cr0wznest
Summary: Brittana. Brittany and Santana's struggle as Brittany develops cancer. All hope is lost until a familiar figure visits Santana and takes her on a journey to remember the love she could potentially lose.
1. Tell me something sweet

I remember that life changing day when the doctor called her and I into his office. He sat us down, daringly gave us a reassuring smile and then said those words that we didn't ever want to hear.

_"Ms. Pierce the tests came back positive. I'm sorry but you have breast cancer."_

That night Brittany and I stayed up crying in eachothers arms. She had mentioned when we were in highschool that the women in her family all had gotten cancer sometime throughout their life. But when you're young you never think it could actually happen to you, or someone you love.

Somedays she was stronger than me, but I would never let her see me faulter. I didn't want her to know that this was killing me, it was unfair because she was the one going through it.

_"I want the chemo,"_ _Brittany decided._

We had discussed it for a while, but Brittany wasn't going to go through this without trying the helpful options, even if there were side effects.

We were supposed to start a life together after highschool. She graduated beside me and held my hand as we threw our graduation caps high in the air. She was there through everything and agreed to move in with me.

Why the fuck was this happening to such a sweet soul like Brittany?

Just like every other time that Brittany got hurt I'd stay by her side. This was no different, but this time it could be fatal.

It was no longer than one week after Brittany began chemo that her hair abandoned her body. I was hoping the drugs wouldn't attack her growing cells, but they did. She still looked beautiful.

* * *

><p>"If they ever make another Harry Potter movie, I'll be hired to play Voldemort," Brittany said, pressing a finger down on her nose.<p>

I laughed at her positivity. What else was I meant to do, tell her to rest and shut up? I couldn't, it's her decision from now on, not mine.

"Did you need anything?" I ask, hoping that she would say yes so I could busy myself.

A noise from outside distracted both us as we turned towards the door. Quinn Fabray was hurrying down the hallway. She finally made it to the room, panting.

"Brittany, thank god!" She then stepped back and leaned her head out of the door. "In here guys!" She yelled.

Suddenly the room was filled with old glee club members. Quinn hadn't aged, even if it had only been 7 years. Rachel had shorter hair and seemed like she had even shrunk shorter. Kurt looked like a movie star with his dark shaded sunglasses and gold jewelery. Noah and Finn were on the other side of the world touring with their band but they called last night to send their love.

"How are you feeling?" Rachel asked, taking a small step towards the blonde.

Brittany smiled at her friends and leaned up. "Darn good!" She said.

They giggled and shook their heads at her as if to say, how do you to it? How are you so positive through all of this? That's exactly what I wanted to know too.

"And you San?" Quinn asked.

I was caught off guard from staring at Brittany's skin too long so all that escaped my mouth was a croaky gasp. I cleared my throat then looked at Quinn.

"She's keeping me alive," I say before giving Brittany a wink for reassurance.

"Did you want to go get some coffee?" I nodded. "Did you want anything Britt?" Kurt asked.

"Just an iced coffee maybe?" She whispered. I rolled my eyes and smiled at her.

She'd been getting an iced coffee everyday since she came to hospital. That's something she craved and had to have, so I didn't complain.

"I knew all along," Kurt said, smirking to himself. We sat down at the cafe downstairs waiting for our coffee's. There was a calming silence during the trip from Brittany's room, down the elevator and through the halls. Kurt just loved to break them.

"What about?" I asked.

"You and Brittany." His voice had that tone when he thinks something is obvious. And that it should be obvious to everyone else.

I recieved my coffee and carefully stirred the boiling contents. Kurt was eyeing me suspiciously, waiting for an answer.

"Fine," I finally broke the silence. "We've always been best friends. But through high school we became friends with benefits. Then I kind of, fell for her. Well I always knew I loved her I just hadn't realized it properly."

I looked at each of my friends who showed the same expression as Lilly Moscovitz when Anne Hathaway's character told her she was a princess.

Rachel was on the verge of crying but confusion hit me. I thought she only cried when she sang a solo?

Quinn patted my hand gently and gave me an _I'm so happy for you _expression. Her eyes watered aswell but I knew she had a better chance of holding back her tears.

"So when we were in Cheerios and I'd say take 5?" Quinn spoke softly.

I smirked. "Britts and I interpreted that as. take 5...pieces of clothing off someone."

"You're strong Santana," Kurt giggled. He was always a softy towards me. "And you're not the only one with a great gay-dar either. I spotted you from a mile away."

My eyes widened but I didn't say anything. I enjoyed their company, it made me feel like we were back in the Mckinley cafeteria and Brittany just had chicken pox. I slowly came back to reality though.

We returned back up to Brittany's room with her drink and as expected she was lying on her bed silently, staring out the window. She did that everyday

"I got your iced coffee babe." Brittany suddenly looked like a kid in a candy store when she saw the drink in my hand. As she took it, her fingers lingered across mine and I gasped at how icy her hands were.

"Crap we have to get going," Quinn gasped, looking down at her watch. "I'm driving Rachel to an audition and it's out of town." Quinn stepped forward and rubbed a thumb across Brittany's left cheek.

Brittany closed her eyes at the contact and leaned into Quinn's hand. "I love you, feel better."

Rachel and Kurt waved, after wishing her well and the 3 friends headed out the door.

* * *

><p>"I have to go to the bathroom." Brittany struggled getting herself up off the bed so I grabbed one of her arms. She used to be so strong but now her weakness shone through.<p>

"You'll be alright?" I asked cautiously. "San, it's just a bathroom," She giggled but looked towards me thankful for my worrying.

I sat on the bed anxiously waiting for her to reappear. Whatever she's doing in there is taking forever, but I'm not going to worry. I had to stay positive, for both our sakes.

Finally Brittany slowly edged the door open. I giggled a little at her, noticing that she had put her hospital gown backwards.

"Britt you've got it the wrong way around." I stepped towards her but paused, noticing something sparkle in her eyes.

She gave me that seductive look she used to give me in high school. When we'd sit in glee club across the room from eachother and I'd catch her gaze. When we sat on the bleachers waiting for our football boyfriends to finish their training. She'd move closer to me and force me to look at her, before biting her lip and strengthening her gaze. I was never able to resist.

"I know," She whispered. "Come here."

I obeyed, stepping closer to her until she was against the wall. She ran her fingers down the front of my shirt, tugging on the fabric occassionally to pull me into her.

"Britt, we shouldn't," I pleaded. I was looking out for her. I didn't want her to be wared down, but she knew how good I was in bed so I'm guessing she didn't mind.

"I just want to feel something San," She whispered in my ear. Her breath wasn't warm like it used to be. Her skin was ice cold, her cheeks weren't that cute pink color and her lips were chapped and faded. She had never looked more beautiful to me.

Her gown was unbuttoned allowing me to see her beautifully toned body. Her breasts were still perky and her hips still grabbable. She had managed to gain a healthy 12 pounds from being in hospital. In highschool we both had aspirations to be the 'hot skinny cheerleader' that all the boys lusted over. We never realized how exhausting it had become.

I slid my fingers down the front of the thin material, grazing them on her skin and slowly pushing the gown off her shoulders. She breathed slowly. I could tell she wanted this moment forever. So did I.

She clutched the front of my shirt and pulled me in so there was no longer space between us. Her lips were as rough as they looked, but I'm kissing the woman that I love and nothing else matters.

My hands began to shake as she frantically directed them around her body. We hadn't been intimate in a while and the fact that I wanted to be careful with her wasn't helping.

"Loosen up San," She panted. I finally gave in as she thrusted her hips against me. It was the erotic gesture that she knew I was weak for.

I pinned her hands above her head, finally getting into the rhythm. She lifted one leg and wrapped it around me, continuing to thurst harder. I found myself becoming more limp just at her touch, which was unsual seeing as I could keep myself together for a long period of time before my body gave out.

But this time was different. Brittany wants this, and I want to give it to her.

She swept her tongue against my lips asking for entry and I gave it to her. Only to realize just how dry her mouth was. I then trailed kisses along her jaw line and down her neck. As soon as I bit on the skin she let out a long desirable moan. "Mmmm San."

"How are you?" I asked. She furrowed her eyebrows thinking that I was going to start small chit chat during sex so I reassured her. "I mean like, how are you feeling, right now? Is this okay?"

She smiled sheepishly and placed a chaste kiss on my nose. "I'm okay," She whispered.

I loosened my grip on her arms and found my way down her body. Her bare breasts had been pressed against mine for almost 10 minutes and I wanted to give those beautiful twins some air.

I massaged them before licking down her stomach to the top of her underwear. She pulled them down herself and I flicked my tongue between her folds. She was enjoying every moment and that's all I needed to know.

She tilted her head back as I grabbed both her thighs to gain better balance and squeezed them. Her body tensed for a moment then eased and she slid down the wall so we were at eye level.

"Orgasms are so much more intense when you're sick," She admitted, wiping her forehead.

All I could do was laugh. Even though she was going through something life changing she still had that bright smile and bubby sense of humor.

"I really think we should tell your parents," I said firmly. The mood had suddenly turned dim as she rolled her eyes.

"San they chose to be out of my life when I told them I'm gay so they don't deserve to know."

I knew Brittany would say that, that was her reply to everything brought up about her parents. They didn't accept their daughter, so they blocked her out of their life and Brittany moved in with me.

My parents weren't so happy about the idea of not having grandchildren even though I kept reminding them of the other options I had. They said it wasn't the same and then kicked me out. I worked 2 jobs and Brittany worked as a professional dancer to support eachother.

"Okay," I replied quietly. She saw the defeat in my eyes and kissed my hand. Then she hopped back into her bed and I sat in the chair beside her.

"San, I'm really cold." Brittany shivered and pulled her blanket over her. I leaned forward and felt her skin which was still ice cold. 2 minutes ago she was wiping sweat off her forehead and now she's like ice.

"Do you need anything?"

"Iced coffee," Brittany squealed, grinning widely. "Brittany," She pouted and knew I couldn't resist. "Fine."

I left the room and walked towards the elevator. I got to the counter and the woman working there gave me a smirk and walked straight for the iced coffee. I blushed realizing that she already knew my order because Brittany wanted that damn iced coffee so much.

I headed back to the elevator and as I got to the correct floor, the doors opened and 5 people were rushing past. They were doctors and nurses and they were headed for Brittany's room.

The coffee dropped out of my hand as I began running behind the doctors and nurses. I only managed to reach the door before they told me I couldn't go in. In a flash I saw Brittany's eyes shut and she was lying there peacefully.

After half an hour of waiting the doctors let me inside. They mentioned that Brittany had stopped breathing suddenly and she had an allergic reaction to the chemo and fell into a coma.

I was speechless. I was helpless. Knowing that she was right there but couldn't reply to anything I would say killed me. I stayed by her side though, like I said I would. Hours passed and she still looked like an angel.

Before I knew it I was dozing off with her hand in mine, hoping that when I wake up she would be smiling at me.


	2. You aren't Brittany

**This is so hard to write, but I'm inlove with this idea, so I shall continue. Please review so I can have some motivation!  
>And thank you to all the favorites and alerts, I won't let you guys down :)<br>xo(cr0wznest)**

* * *

><p>Her eyes, <em>your <em>eyes_._

Her lips, _your _lips_._

Her hair, _your _hair_._

I dreamt of her voice that night, complimenting me back after I named everyone of her beautiful features. Her voice sounded healthy and no longer irritatingly muffled. Her breathing was clear and relaxed.

I fell out of my dream and opened my eyes, realizing that it wasn't a dream at all.

"Hey San," She spoke.

Brittany stood by the window, elegantly stretching her calf muscles on the ledge.

I hadn't said a word, my jaw had dropped to the floor and was in danger of breaking off.

I looked back at Brittany's body lying peacefully on the hospital bed.

Then I felt a hand on my shoulder. She didn't grip too hard and her hands weren't as rough.

"We should go," She whispered in my ear.

I jumped and ran to the other side of the room. Shutting my eyes, I tried to think of the day Brittany and I experimented in drugs. I thought thinking of the substances would make me feel them, if this were a dream. I thought I could feel the numbing pleasure take over.

I opened my eyes and Brittany was standing across from me, twiddling her thumbs as if she were trying to be patient with me.

My mind was falling to pieces and my heart was tightening in my chest. I felt the urge to vomit but nothing came out of my mouth except for a small sob.

Brittany gave me a sympathetic stare as I broke down. I wanted to get out of this dream because having her near me, alive and well, made me realize what I could be missing if she never wakes up.

"It's not a dream." It was as if she read my thoughts. A smirk grew on her face and that's when I knew she could.

"W-what a-are you?" I stuttered through my tears.

She furrowed her eyebrows and moved towards me. "I'm Bri-"

"Don't say her name," I screamed. "You aren't Brittany, she's in a coma," I began to cry out more and take deep breaths in. This girl _is_ Brittany, but she has long blonde locks reaching her breasts and a fit body.

I now realize I'm staring at the 17 year old Brittany. The first time Britt and I experimented was when we were 17. We had a lot of _firsts_ at that age. The only one worth remembering is the first time I had sex with Brittany.

"Please, you can't be Britt," I muttered. I'm in denial but I can't believe what I'm seeing. It couldn't be remotely possible that the love of my life is standing infront of me looking healthy and bright.

"I am, now come with me. I want to show you something." Her voice was so light and hopeful. I could almost see the sparkle in her eyes.

She stretched out her hand for me to take it. I was wondering for a moment that if I did would I really feel her.

"Fuck off," I whispered, burying my head in my hands.

"It's okay, I'll wait." Brittany sat leaning against the front of the hospital bed. She had looked down at her vegetated state beforehand and shook her head. She didn't want to see herself as much as I didn't.

* * *

><p>She began humming the tune to songbird. My eyes opened but my face still remained buried in my hands. Her hums were echoed and vibrant.<p>

The sound was too much for me to take, it brough back memories which I wanted so much to keep until Brittany became sick. I thought of the future and how everything was going to be fine _when_ she woke up.

"Can you please be quiet," I mumbled, lifting my head up to face her.

She paused straight away and sat quietly before mouthing a quick sorry in my direction.

I placed the palms of my hands on the side of my head, rubbing them violenty on my hair and skin. I almost hoped that this would bring me back to reality. A reality where Brittany was still stable and could still hear me.

Realizing that Brittany could read my thoughts, I remained silent and spoke in my mind. I repeated for her to leave but when I looked up she was shaking her head.

This girl was determined, just like the 17 year old Brittany I remembered.

She was shy at first when we started at Mckinley together. She was always in my shadow expecting me to speak for her, but when we joined glee club and she was able to show off her amazing dance talent, that's when she realized she didn't have to hide anymore.

I missed her shy side but I loved the fact Brittany had finally found herself and was able to express that to the students, even though most of them were naive and brutal towards us.

Glee club wasn't the most popular club at Mckinley, but it was something Britt and I grew to love, so we fucked off all of the haters and accepted the fact our popularity was declining.

"I love you," Brittany said sweetly.

The affection in her tone made me cringe, knowing that _my_ Brittany was in a coma. What if she is my Brittany? Maybe it's her spirit, or conciounce.

"I'm neither." I jumped remebering that Brittany could hear my thoughts.

"So, who are you then?" I hissed.

"I'm just me." She smiled. She knew that if she said her name I would start to sob again so she thought of my needs first and chose a different reply.

She was always putting me before her. Through highschool when I blew her off to pleasure myself in what wasn't even great sex, she'd still smile at me in the morning.

"Well, just me," I said sarcastically. "Where are we going?"

I didn't want to hear her answer, I was oblivious to this girls intentions with me but she claimed to be real and she claimed to be Brittany; Britt never lied.

She began to stand up and slowly step towards me. Her footsteps echoed just like her voice and it was like alarm bells in my ear.

I closed my eyes trying to block out the deafening sound when I felt her hand on my knee. That was definetly real, I could feel every finger and her soft palm.

"Trust me?" She asked.

I swallowed the lump that had developed in my throat and placed my hand on top of hers, rubbing a finger or two around hers to capture the moment.

"Always."

* * *

><p>A few moments passed and I opened my eyes. We were in a dark place which seemed to have nothing in it until Brittany turned on the light.<p>

I recognized the room straight away; it was our bedroom. There were clothes scattered on the floor; mine and Brittany's. I couldn't pack her things because I felt like that was giving up.

She belonged with me, in our apartment and I never wanted that to change.

My eyes flooded with tears as memories began soaring through my mind. With every piece of clothing I saw splayed across the carpet, a distinct day popped into my head.

Brittany's eyes widened as she read my thoughts. She knew I was thinking about the bright yellow dress she wore to prom which I had no trouble removing that night.

I wiped my eyes dry and smirked in her direction.

"There's that smile," She whispered. Her smile turned sad, realizing just how hard it was to face me.

I stood up, my expression serious as I walked towards her. She began to feel the heat and stepped back. She tripped on her shoe laces and the rolls were reversed. It was my turn to make her feel.

My walk turned into a run as I sat down beside her on the floor.

"You're okay?" I asked. Confusion struck me as she seemed to not only enjoy the fall but giggle at my protectiveness.

"Fine," She breathed.

"I want so much to touch you again," I whispered as our faces bodies were so close, talking normally would've been silly.

I reached my hand out towards her cheek, which soon became pink. The tips of my fingers hovered near her skin, but never fully touched. She closed her eyes and I wanted to make her feel, with everything I had inside of me.

My hand dropped to the floor before I could. She sighed and a sad smile crept on her face.

I looked up to the ceiling, blinking away my tears. I could feel Brittany's eyes never leave mine but I couldn't bare to look at her again.

Standing up, I grabbed a few of her clothes and folded them away. She sat on the edge of our bed watching me, but I surprisingly didn't mind.

I stared to my right left noticing the photographs which were situated on a familiar desk Britt and I once made love on. There were photo's of my family and hers, but they were all when we were young. When we didn't know what love or lesbians meant.

There were photo's of Brittany and I at prom, with a glum looking Will Schuester in the background. Teachers weren't meant to be getting any that night anyway, it was all about the students!

I noticed a frame with a photograph of the whole Glee club in it. I squinted my eyes and saw something I had never noticed before. I was sitting between Tina and Quinn and they had threathing glares on their faces towards there then boyfriends. I however had my signature smirk.

* * *

><p><em>"Stop shoving Noah!" Rachel yelled at the boy who was being pushed by Quinn.<em>

_"It's Fabray, not me!" He said innocently._

_"Guys please, we want to take a nice class photo for the yearbook, don't mess it up!" Mr. Schue sighed._

_"Which I will be defacing," I muttered to myself. _

_Luckily nobody had heard me, because I would be out of Glee club for sure. I wasn't only in Glee club because I had a passion for singing and performing. It was mainly to see the smile on Britt's face everytime we had an assignment. She lit up at the chance to dance and I melted watching her. _

_"Okay, the blush has been applied, you may continue camera man," Kurt sneered. _

_Puck scoffed and imitated the more feminine boy applying blush. _

_Finn had his eyes obviously peering down Rachel's revealing tank top and Mercedes looked like she was about to clobber somebody if they didn't be quiet._

_Sam was on the end, staring around nervously. He had just joined and wasn't sure who to be friends with. I'm not sure if he even liked us._

_Rachel's mouth was wide open as she noticed Finn's leering, but before she could reach out to hit him __we heard a flash and the camera man quickly grabbed his equiptment and hurried out of the room. _

_"Well, hopefully that turns out okay." Mr. Schue shrugged, walking towards the piano._

* * *

><p>I looked past all of the awkward expressions, straight at Brittany's. She was sitting behind me on a higher level looking down. Her eyes glistened and she was the only one to manage a genuine smile. It wasn't towards the camera though, it was directed at me. I must've looked at that picture 100 times and never saw what she really felt at that moment in time; pure love.<p>

"We shared so much in this room," She broke the silence.

I studied the room again before finally staring at her. "Yeah, the best moments of my life were here with you. Loving you, holding you, I couldn't imagine-"

Brittany sensed my voice break, knowing I couldn't finished my sentence. She stood up and placed her hand on mine. Everytime she did that I couldn't really feel her full touch. It just felt like an opaque sheet grazing my skin.

"I remember some pretty amazing moments somewhere else."

With that said, everything went black again and I found myself lying on familiar marble floors. I looked to my left and saw some run down metal lockers. The same image to my right, except for the beautiful girl that was infront of them.

"Hi," She whispered, smirking.

I giggled and nudged her with my shoulder. "Hey."

I then broke my gaze with Brittany and faced forward realizing where we were.

"Mckinley."


	3. Memoirs of Mckinley

**A/N: **Sorry it took me a while to update but here it is, please read and review, the more reviews, the more I'll be happier to continue this fic because I really love writing it :)  
><strong>xojulia(cr0wznest)<strong>

* * *

><p>"Mckinley," I breathed out, using my hands to lift me off the ground.<p>

Brittany stood beside me glowing. There wasn't even a glimpse of sunlight inside or shining through the windows, she just shone.

I began walked forward slowly, studying all of the achievements and sign up sheets on the bulletin boards when I noticed Brittany wasn't following. I turned around slowly and caught her looking down towards my ass.

"Subtle much?" Brittany didn't even blush or pretend like she wasn't leering. She just faintly smiled and met my gaze.

It's not like we were strangers and she was just some perve. She was the love of my life who admired me just as much as I admired her, so it was fine.

"Do you still love me?" She asked.

I took a deep breath and bit my lip before speaking. "I don't think I can love you anymore than I already do."

She caught up with me and stood a few inches away as we walked through the hall. I peered into our spanish classroom where we had shared a few memorable make out sessions during highschool. Then we arrived in the choir room and I was instantly hit with the memories of our infamous one liners we'd shout out during glee rehearsal.

I walked towards the piano and Brittany sat in one of the chairs infront of me. I noticed a twinkle in her eye and an excited smile played on her lips; like she was expecting me to break out in song.

I started tapping at the keys and it soon turned into the tune of _Forever _by _Ben Harper._

Before I knew it I began singing the song and forgot that Brittany was in the room watching me intensly.

_Not talkin' 'bout a year_  
><em>No not three or four<em>

Closing my eyes I fell smoothly into the rhythm and found myself drifting off into a pool of memories that I had shared with Brittany in this room- the sideways glances, the flirty massages and the pinky linking that we never grew out of.

_I don't want that kind of forever_  
><em>In my life anymore<em>  
><em>Forever always seems<em>  
><em>to be around when it begins<em>  
><em>but forever never seems<em>  
><em>to be around when it ends<em>

Opening my eyes I saw Brittany express pure adoration just through her faint smile. The twinkle never left her eyes and I took that as my que to continue.

_So give me your forever_  
><em>Please your forever<em>  
><em>Not a day less will do From you<em>

My eyes remained opened and for the rest of the song I found my eyes watering just by staring at the beautiful woman that couldn't possibly be real. But for now she was.

_People spend so much time_  
><em>Every single day<em>  
><em>Runnin' 'round all over town<em>  
><em>Givin' their forever away<em>  
><em>But no not me<em>  
><em>I won't let my forever roam<em>  
><em>and now I hope I can find<em>  
><em>my forever a home<em>

My voice belted out the rest of the words, hoping that I could somehow send a message to her that I would still be here for her, whatever the situation, forever.

_So give me your forever_  
><em>Please your forever<em>  
><em>Not a day less will do<em>  
><em>From you<em>

She stood up and slowly moved to the melodic beat, swaying her hips while her eyes were shut tight. Her arms outstretched, swaying like a birds wings.

_Like a handless clock with numbers_  
><em>An infinite of time<em>  
><em>No not the forever found<em>  
><em>Only in the mind<em>  
><em>Forever always seems<em>  
><em>to be around when things begin<em>  
><em>but forever never seems<em>  
><em>to be around when things end<em>  
><em>So give me your forever<em>  
><em>Please your forever<em>  
><em>Not a day less will do<em>  
><em>From you<em>

When I had finished the song I stood up and walked towards her, my hands fiddling with the fabric of my shirt. Even though we had moments where we felt so comfortable, I still felt a world away from her.

"You're so amazing," She said as if it should be obvious to me.

I wasn't vein, I didn't think of myself as anymore than a Lima loser. But Brittany had managed to make me really feel for the first time in my life and it just felt extrodinary.

"Take me away. Somewhere where we're both alive and well."

"Don't you feel alive San?" She asked, furrowing her eyebrows.

I knew I couldn't tell her I was hurting. It was just amazing that she was standing infront of me looking completely fine, I didn't know how or why.

"I'm only alive when I'm with you," I replied stepping closer.

Fuck distance. Fuck pain. Fuck losing the people that matter most to you.

She pursed her lips and began walking towards the door. "C'mon."

I followed her down a familiar path. Through the cafeteria where she had revealed that her cat was reading her diary. She loved Lord Tubbington, so whatever she had written in that tatty notebook must have been important; she seemed so worried.

I halted as we passed by two familiar lockers. She leant against her own and I leant against mine. Out of the corner of my eye I could see that she lifted her pinky for me to take it. I stretched mine out and it lingered a few inches away from hers. We both stood there in silence for a moment, soaking up the energy we gained from not even touching. It just felt good.

We ended up on the stage of the auditorium, on opposite sides of the room.

"In New York when we were in that hotel room arguing with Quinn. I wanted to tell her," I sighed looking deeply into Brittany's eyes. "I wanted to say it after she was naming all of the couples who had love. I wanted to scream that we had it too."

"Why didn't you?" She asked, taking small steps towards me and planting herself down on the floor.

"I guess, I didn't think it was the right time. We went through so many boys in highschool, none of them lived up to you. So I didn't just want to say it randomly, I wanted to tell you when I felt it was the right time. You meant more to me than anyone of those assholes."

"Remember Rachel's party?" We were now laying on our backs, side by side on the floor. I turned to face her and felt a lump in my throat as I tried forming words.

"Yes. You were with Artie." I retracted my gaze back to the ceiling.

"I was," She replied bluntly, sitting up.

I followed suit and we were now staring into eachother eyes. It reminded me of the first time we had kissed.

"But remember how we got drunk and you licked salt of my stomach?" Brittany's smirked caused me to blush and shy away in return.

Thinking of that moment where we were so close to eachother and I could actually feel her skin on the tip of my tongue, made me miss it so much.

"You liked it?" I asked.

She nodded and stared out towards the dozens of seats sprawled all across the room.

"It made me realize what I was missing out on at that time, but I was drunk so everything was kind of hazy in the morning." There it was Brittany's signature pout she made when she felt bad about something.

"I remember every moment we spent together Britt. You have to know that you had the biggest effect on me that anyone in my life has had. You changed me, you helped me, you praised me and I fell for you."

Brittany rubbed her forehead and I could tell she felt guilty but tried not to show it. I reassured her by reaching out and squeezing her hand.

Darkness took over once again and I found myself blinking furiously, trying to find some source of light.

There Brittany was, beside the light switch grinning at me. I was sitting a booth, a booth I remember I claimed was my thrown everytime I visited this place.

"Order anything you want," Brittany smirked, sitting infront of me in the booth.

"I think I'll go with Breadstix."


	4. BreadstiX and Dress Ups

_"Order anything you want," Brittany smirked, sitting infront of me in the booth._

_"I think I'll go with Breadstix."_

Brittany then approached me with a basket of breadsticks which I instinctively licked my lips too.

My thoughts wondered for a moment at the realization that I may not be able to really taste food in whatever world this is. But I graced my fingers along the keys of a piano, so why couldn't I taste?

Noticing my hesitation, Brittany cleared her throat and snapped me out of my thoughts. Thoughts that I forgot she could hear. She then gave me a reassuring wink which allowed me to pick up the first breadstick I had seen in almost a year.

"Yummy?" She asked, while her chin rested against the palm of her hand. She was staring intently at me while I ate and I felt so self concious. The crumbs would fall on my chin and shirt but she didn't make a swift move to wipe them away. She just giggled as I did so myself.

"Very yummy," I replied through small chews.

A few minutes passed and I had just finished my 5th breadstick, when Brittany stood up abruptly.

"Wait wait," she yelled holding her hands up. "We have to do this right, get up San." She signalled for me to stand outside the door and before I could question her strange actions, she slowly walked towards me. Her gaze never left mine and I noticed the small smirk creeping on her lips.

"Britt wha-" She held up a finger silencing me and then held out a flower. I took it and our fingers brushed together causing my breath to hitch. She was barely there.

"Go on a date with me," She knew she didn't have to ask but merely state the question like it was already a done deal.

"I don't know if I should," I replied non chalantly, hoping that she would fight for it.

"Oh," She pouted and stepped back. "Dance with me then?"

I chuckled at her eagerness to sweep me off my feet after all this time and shook my head.

Brittany's jaw dropped before she put on a very serious expression. I noticed her stepping back towards me with a now, seductive, expression on her face. I backed up as far as I could until I was fully against the wall. My feet nervously shifted against the floor while my gaze connected intensly with Brittany's.

She made it inches away from me before stopping. Our noses were almost brushing but even as she took breaths I couldn't seem to feel them. She then raised her arm so her hand was just above my hand, still looking me dead in the eye.

"San, please?" Her eyebrows raised and she pouted; something I couldn't resist.

We weren't allowed to touch. And I had know clue where the music was coming from. We stood about 5 inches apart, locking eachothers gaze the whole time. I so wanted to reach out and see if I could feel her this time, but something was telling me to wait.

After a while the music had picked up a fast beat, Brittany was dancing on the table and I had taken refuge on the counter.

We kicked off ketchup bottles and threw plates at the walls. All of this made our blood pump and right then and there I thought Brittany felt alive. She was enjoying every moment of this. It was like she had more fun as whatever she was there, then when she was really living.

"Brittany!" I yelled, catching my breath.

"Santana!" She squealed back in a mocking tone.

"You're beautiful," I breathed, but she heard me.

After a while of Brittany staring back at me with pure adoration in her eye she finally opened her mouth.

"Jump," She began. I looked back at her confused and she continued. "Jump to me!"

I swallowed hard and even though the counter wasn't far off the ground I still didn't know how I could jump _to _Brittany.

"Do you trust me baby?" Her words caused me to look up at her and stare her deep in the eyes. I was silent for so long she could sense my hesitation.

But I did trust Brittany, how could I not?

Without speaking out loud, I thought it. She grinned and I took a short run up before leaping. Brittany also jumped and how hands connected. Before I could ask her why, everything turned dark.

* * *

><p>As soon as the lids of my eyes began to flutter open I instantly knew where we were now. I had spent countless memorable moments in this very room and every one of them I had cherished.<p>

"It looks exactly the same," I conffessed, studying the photos of Brittany as a young girl.

"This is where you told me you loved me, where you kissed my sore better, where you and I made love." Brittany caught my gaze as she said this and all I could do was return a small smile, before continuing to study the room.

There was a sparkle out of the corner of my eye and I leant down passed the cabinet. Picking it up I realized that it was a simple brown box with jewels encrusted on the lid. Before I could open it, Brittany snatched it away.

"You have to wait," She said, hugging the box tightly. "Take this with you, but just wait."

"Okay," I agreed, not questioning what was inside.

I slid the pads of my fingers along the mirror-door of the wardrobe and noticed that Brittany was staring back at me. It wasn't a seductive look but it wasn't a serious one either. She seemed at peace when she looked at me and I desperately wanted to reach out. This was it, it simply felt like the perfect time.

Before I could muster up the courage to turn around I slid open the door to the wardrobe and took out a short black and green striped dress.

"You kept this?" I eyed the dress up and down before turning to Brittany.

"Ofcourse. It still smells like you."

Brittany had a sweet smile on her before grabbing a pair of demin overalls that hung beside all of her other unique dresses. She put them on in mear seconds as I snaked into the dress.

I noticed Brittany's eyes on me the whole as I stripped down to my lace black underwear. She was obviously leering, but I never told her to stop. Even if I had looked at her she would've just winked or done something cute.

"You're so gorgeous," I squealed, poking the air inches away from Brittany's body. She giggled and ran towards the bed before carefully eyeing me up and down.

I pursed my lips as my expression turned innocent, as I still managed to get nervous under her intense gaze.

She licked her lips before biting the bottom one and right then I wanted to touch.

"It still fits," She finally said. It was her turn to feel nervous as I slowly crept towards her. My line of vision connecting with hers as I took small agonizing steps.

I finally got within 5 inches of her and the urge to move closer was sinking in. I couldn't resist. I ghosted my fingers along her arm and Brittany stared down at the action.

"Can I kiss you?" This made Brittany instantly prick her head up and stare at me with the equal amount of desire. "Will you feel it?"

"Try," Brittany barely said as a whisper.

I leaned in, letting our noses brush and finally not flinching at the almost feeling I felt. It was enough to make me want more.

My fingers snaked around her neck and the feeling became surreal, almost strange. As our lips connected I felt the most sensational rush flow through me. My temperature instantly rose as I felt Brittany grip my waist. She squeezed it, allowing me to move flush against her.

Our bodies now fully connected I parted my lips, allowing Brittany's tongue to dance with mine. A soft moan escaped her lips when I deepened the kiss and now I was fully aware that I could most likely make love to this girl right infront of me.

I slowly leant her back on the bed and she crawled backwards until her head lay on the pillow. I hovered over her and unclipped the straps of her overalls as she slid her hands up my thighs so my dress was now more like a top. She slid her fingers down the fabric of my panties and squeezed my ass, causing me to now moan.

I arched my back and began trailing light kissed down her neck. When I managed to rid her of her clothes, she now lay beneath me in a light pink bra and underwear.

Not wanting to waist anytime, I allowed Brittany to tear of my dress as our kisses soon became frantic and heated. She tugged down my panties and I pushed my knee inbetween her thighs, teasing her heated core.

"Mmm San," She moaned, urging me on even more.

I bit down on her bra strap and slid the fabric off her before unclipping it. Then she began running her fingers through my hair, pulling and tugging at my brown locks. I was so desperate to feel her again, that I plunged two fingers in immediately after our clothes were fully off.

The skin on skin contact caused a rush of desire and wanting to burn through me. I knew Brittany felt it aswell, because her eyes were closed and she continued biting her lip as I kissed down her stomach.

I kissed both sides of her thighs before flicking her clit and leaning in. My tongue slowly and teasingly danced along her folds. She moaned louder as my motions continued, leaving me almost breathless.

As soon as Brittany had her first orgasm I continued sliding fingers in and out to let her ride it out. She then felt the burning of 3 more orgasms as I licked desperately at her folds. She scratched and clawed at my shoulders, arching her back and bucking her hips.

I then lifted my head up and slid my way up her body back to her lips. After soft kisses she licked her lips, tasting herself. Before I knew it she flipped me over and her eyes told me that I had to be repayed. She slipped her tongue in my mouth and I couldn't help the sensation down between my thighs which began tingling.

"B-brittany, fu-fuck!" I moaned. She crawled down my body towards my heated core, hoping to get a taste. As soon as her tongue hit my slit my eyes shot opened and at that moment I knew this was all wrong.

Pushing her off me, I stood up beside the bed and held my arms over my chest.

"I can't do this, you aren't real, this isn't happening!" I yelled, tears now streaming down my cheeks and hitting the floor.

Brittany stood up and cupped my cheeks before I could turn away.

"Look at me! I'm here, holding you, kissing you, making love to you! If that isn't real then I don't know what the fuck is!" Her words spat at me like venom. But it was a venom I was addicted too.

"I just," I stepped backwards and gathered my clothes. "Need a moment."

Walking outside it felt like the sun was 10000 degrees. Maybe it was the passion and heat that I had just experienced with Brittany. I felt my bare feet hit the soft cool dirt as I tredded towards a lonely tree.

Engraved on the front were the words, _'Sanny loves Britt'_. Tears continued to run freely down my face as I touched the aging wood. I swept my fingers over Brittany's name and began to sob openly.

I ran to the middle of the backyard and buried at my face in my hands before stretching my arms out and looking towards the sky.

"I'm here!" I yelled. "Why can't you be here, with me?" Falling to my knees I noticed Brittany hadn't even chased after me. She knew I needed time and I loved her for it.

"Brittany," I whispered, staring down at the one colorful flower that stuck out in the dirt.

I crushed it in my hands, releasing my last few drops of tears before gathering myself and walking back inside.

Brittany stood in the doorway of her bedroom with her arms folded, but she wasn't expecting anything from me.

"I love you so much Santana, it hurts. Breathing around you hurts, hearing your name from anyone other than me hurts, touching you hurts. But it's so worth it, because your happiness is worth it. This is me talking. Your girlfriend, Brittany Pierce. The girl who licked the icecream off your lips when we were 9, the girl who copied off you in maths because I was too distracted by your beauty that I ignore the teacher. I'm _your_ girl Santana."

One single tear fell. I first thought that was all the tears I had left inside me, but soon enough more tears began to fall.

She outstretched her arm and I stared down at the gesture, knowing exactly what she meant.

* * *

><p><strong>Let me know what you think :)<strong>


	5. Never let you go

Brittany carried the tightly shut box in her left hand as she jogged towards the park. I was dazily tredding behind her, trying to figure out where we were now. As I turned back I could see a familiar building but avoided staring at it for too long.

I continued walking, trying my best to keep up with Brittany who was only inches away from the swing set. I finally made it, stopping as I watched Brittany tilt her head back, close her eyes and sway forwards and backwards.

"Are you in there?" I asked pointing backwards.

Brittany turned towards the hospital and shook her head. "We're in a different world San, with only you and me."

She faintly smiled at me before turning her head and swinging higher.

I stepped forward, carefully standing a safe distance behind where Brittany was swinging. When the blonde flung back, I caught the swing and brought my lips to Brittany's ear.

"I don't want to let you go." There was a hint of fear in my voice but it didn't seem to affect Brittany.

"Don't," Brittany replied simply, leaning her head back against my shoulder.

The truth is no matter how much I tried to deny that this wasn't _my_ Brittany. The more time we spent together it became hard to believe that this wasn't Brittany. I almost felt guilty if I had to leave the girl here alone.

She looked like she didn't want to be left alone, especially in a place that doesn't even feel real.

I closed off my thoughts for a moment as I heard footsteps padding over towards the lake. I ran over to where Brittany was standing. She was throwing small pieces of bread to the ducks that were waiting anxiously in the water.

I then smiled to myself. This girl was definitely _my_ Brittany.

After feeding the ducks, Brittany pulled an icecream out of thin air for her and me to share. I just shook my head, I had no idea how Brittany was doing all of this, but I wasn't complaining.

Brittany giggled, noticing my bottom lip where a smidgen of icecream was sitting. I was oblivious to it, because I was just too caught up in staring lovingly at her.

I then paused, noticing my girlfriends giggles and knitted my eyebrows in confusion.

"Britt, what is it?" I asked confused.

"You got..." Brittany trailed off as she leaned forward and licked the icecream off with the tip of her tongue.

I closed her eyes at the contact and breathed in deeply. I took in Brittany's strange scent, it almost smelt like me.

"Mmm," I moaned, looking towards the blonde. "You have something on your neck," I finished.

Before Brittany could react she felt lips kiss and nip at the side of her neck. Brittany instinctively closed her eyes and leaned into the contact.

I trailed light kisses up her neck and along her jaw line before stopping inches away from her lips.

The day turned to night faster than I thought. Brittany and I lay upon a rug staring up at the stars. Something I've always been meaning to do with her. She shut her eyes while taking in a deep breath and I found myself staring intently at her lips. I regretted so much the way I spoke to her and pushed her away. I just wanted to feel her and for some reason it scared me.

My eyes flickered towards her lips as she bit down on the bottom one. She still had her eyes closed and her fingers were now trailing up my arm.

"San..." She whispered, causing me to shudder a little.

I sat up, leaning on my elbows as I looked expectantly at her. She didn't even open her eyes. Her lips pouted abit and I took that as my cue to lean in.

Our lips disconnected only for air, then reconnected happily. I loved the way her tongue would play with mine and how mine would respond. My hands soon made their way to her waist and I squeezed down, just for a little bit of reassurance that this was real.

As our kiss deepened, I rolled over and straddled Brittany's thighs. She ran her hands down the small of my back and I whimpered when her fingers slipped under the waistband of my pants.

She broke her lips away from mine and for a moment I felt disappointed. "Can I?" She asked respectively. I nodded and crashed our lips together once more. Her fingers slid to my stomach and ventured down into my underwear. Her breath hitched when she felt the wetness. I began kissing her neck while her mouth exhaled heavy breaths right near my ear.

It was the most arousing moment that I had ever felt, since the first time we made love. It felt so right.

My legs tensed as she entered my folds. Gliding her fingers along them so gently, it was almost a struggle to keep my whole body up.

After a while I felt my body give out and I collapsed on her, panting so hard I thought I wasn't going to be able to speak. She ran her fingers through my hair, equally as exhausted and we relaxed finally in eachothers embrace.

I then rolled off of her and we sat up, staring out at the lake.

"I'm sorry about the way I talked to you and how I acted at the house," I apologized, my eyes showing pure sadness.

Brittany smiled sadly but then cupped my cheek before speaking. "Do you remember when we used to dress up in wedding gowns when we were young?"

I nodded hesitantly, a little bit confused at the sudden change of topic. Remembering the smile on Brittany's young face as she held the bouquet of flowers, I giggled and moved closer towards the blonde.

"You told me that you were practicing for when we really get married someday," Both of us smiled lovingly at one another.

I laced her fingers with mine, still not sure how a touch could transport us to a different place in our lives, but it did.

For the first time, everything stayed black. I felt carpet beneath me but Brittany's presence didn't seem to be anywhere. Suddenly the door swung open and two bodies brushed past me. Before the door could shut I saw the rain pour down outside.

"Brittany," I yelled, but she didn't respond.

She looked different. Her outfit had changed and her hair was pulled back off her face. I tried to hold back a whimper but I soon found myself sobbing. Brittany wasn't paying any attention to me and I seemed to be alone in this place.

Silence took over the room and the dim light from the corner of the room eluminated the darkness, well most of it.

I held my knees to my chest as I watched Brittany setting the table with her mother. I soon realized that this wasn't just another place, this was a memory. This was Brittany showing me what I had missed all that time ago.

There was a figure beside me and the real Brittany was there. The one that had taken me on this journey and the one that I fell inlove with all over again.

She mirrored my position and watched herself talk animatedly with her mother. Then she began yelling and her mother was yelling horrible words back.

All I could hear was, "I'm gay," "You're a disgrace," "Get out," and "I love her."

My heart tighetened. I didn't know what Brittany felt about me all those years ago. Now that I thought about it, it was all my fault that we didn't talk about feelings. Brittany wanted to but I shut her out.

That was until I finally grew up and the feelings became too much to hold back.

Tears rolled down my face like the last few drops water after you turn off a tap. The few lingering drips that send an annoyance through your head because something so small can make such an echoing noise.

But tears didn't have that effect. People wiped them away and they continued to fall.

Brittany squeezed my thigh reassuringly as the other Brittany weeped on the floor, pleading with her mother to let her stay.

I couldn't look anymore, so I met Brittany's gaze and her eyes took me to a safer place.

"It's time," Brittany said.

Before I could respond the blonde was waving at me almost as if she was saying goodbye. I was completely stunned. I was frozen in place until I saw a familiar box resting on the grass. I picked it up and carefully opened the lid.

Inside was a gold wedding band. There was a small note above it that said "Marry me?"

The box looked like it was aging, meaning Brittany had to have kept it for a long time. The time she waited to ask me to marry her was unknown, the ring looked clean and new, but the paper was tatterted.

Looking up I noticed that Brittany was no longer infront of me, instead she was running off toward the hospital.

I grabbed the ring, dropping the box in a rush to catch up to Brittany. She kept telling me no, don't follow her, don't touch her. But I my fingers brushed across hers and everything went white.

I lifted my head up, not aware of where I was as my vision was blurry. I soon understood when I saw Brittany laying on the hospital bed.

I gripped tightly on Brittany's hand as she lay there motionless.

"You will not leave this earth without being Mrs. Santana Lopez, you hear me?" I pleaded desperately thinking my girlfriend would miraculously wake up from her endless slumber.

After a few minutes I decided to stay quiet and as my eyes closed slowly, I heard a beeping noise coming from the monitor.

Slowly looking right, I saw that Brittany's heart beat was increasing and she was starting to wake up. A few doctors and nurses sped into the room, mouth agape, wondering how this could have happened.

I sat there, equally as shocked. Brittany was right there, smiling back at me.

"What's the time?" She mumbled, still trying to stay awake.

"It's time for you to get dressed," I replied non chalantly.

Brittany stared at me confused. She wondered why I was forcing her into getting straight into action right after she woke up. But like she said, it's time.

Violins played in the background as she walked down the isle. I couldn't take my eyes off of hers as a smirk played on her lips. People looked on at her in awe, as she stepped slowly closer to me.

Rachel, Quinn and Kurt were in the second row, all of them in tears. I couldn't control my giggles as Brittany inched closer to me, it was hard enough controlling my hands. I wanted so much to embrace the beautiful woman infront of me and kiss her forever.

"Santana Maria Lopez, do you take Brittany Susan Pierce to be your wife?" The priest asked.

"I do," I answered, locking my gaze with Brittany's.

"Brittany Susan Pierce do you take Santana Maria Lopez to be your wife?" He repeated.

Silence.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I KNOW I KNOW! YOU'RE GOING TO KILL ME FOR THIS CLIMAX, BUT I JUST HAD TO!


	6. Fight for you

**A/N: It's coming to an end so please review and let me know if you want a epilogue, because I have a little something in mind :) If not then this is the final chapter and I hope all the readers have enjoyed Fading. **

* * *

><p>Brittany kept smiling at me and I looked at her nervously waiting for her to answer. She didn't.<p>

"Britt?" I asked, a stray tear lingering under my eye.

Her figure began to dissapear and my vision was blurry again. Suddenly a familiar black shadow took over my vision, a sight I never thought I would see again.

"Santana, are you asleep?" A voice asked.

I looked around, feeling like I could pass out again at any moment. But I felt hands on my waist, holding me up and keeping me steady.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," The voice spoke again.

I saw blonde hair, the sweetest blonde hair my eyes had ever seen.

"You saw the past, so I had to show you what our future could be like. It was time."

I felt tears linger again, but I held them back. I sniffed and bit my lip trying so hard to keep my emotions under control. But just staring at Brittany made me feel everything at once.

"I thought it was real," I mumbled.

Brittany cupped my cheeked, forcing me to look at her. "It's as real as it'll ever be. And it can happen. If I wake up."

"Stop saying if, you will!" I screeched.

She loosened her grip and stepped back, almost expecting for me to lash out.

"What would your answer have been?" I made sure our eyes connected so I would know if she's telling the truth.

She looked me dead in the eyes and said, "I do."

She placed her pinkie on mine, followed by the rest of her fingers. Then with one final clasp of my hand everything turned dark.

It felt like forever travelling through this pitch black ecstasy. Brittany was beside me but began to loosen her grip.

"I have to go and you have to stay by me," She shouted.

"Stay with me," I pleaded, tears forming in my eyes.

She smiled, one last smile that I recognized. At 17 we were both just looking for that special someone to tell everything too. That person we could cuddle up to while watching a scary movie. That person to kiss on the lips so every trouble we had would melt away.

She was melting away. Slipping out of my reach and before I could call out, she was gone.

My eyes opened slowly and I heard the monitor beep. It was that long agonizing beep which told me that she was actually slipping away for good.

Doctors came rushing in with their equiptment and told me to back off.

I stood by the window, the tears in my eyes never leaving. Yelling for her, I held onto the ring that I hoped I could give to her _when _she wakes up.

The doctors were repeating numbers and trying to resusitate her. I then left the room, unaware if the love of my life would be alive when I walked back in.

I called Quinn, knowing that she would be hear right away.

10 minutes passed and the doctors were still at work. Quinn came running down the hall into my arms. She was sobbing harder that I was because there were simply no tears left to shed. I nuzzled my head into the crook of her neck and began breathing heavily.

Was that all a dream? I asked myself. Was the 17 year old Brittany really taking me on a journey throughout the best times of my life?

I didn't have time to figure it out. Some of the doctors were walking out with Brittany on a stretcher. I heard one of them mumble to take her into emergency.

Why her?

Quinn and I sat beside eachother in the waiting room outside the emergency entrance. She was rubbing my back soothinly, repeating that Brittany was going to wake up.

My eyes began to close, my breathing evened out and I fell into a deep slumber.

* * *

><p><em>"Brittany this is Santana," Quinn introduced us on the first day of junior year.<em>

_"Hey there," I said smiling._

_Brittany grinned back and said, "Hello," In the sweetest voice I had ever heard._

_Months passed and we were known at the top bitches at Mckinley. Trouble followed us everyone and we all had issues with relationships. _

_The whole time I knew who I belonged with. So one night I drove to Brittany's house for a sleepover. It was completely innocent but romantic. I knew my intentions and I'm sure Brittany knew hers aswell. _

_I crawled into bed, while Brittany opted to sleep on the floor._

_"Come here," I whispered. She stood up and pulled back the covers. Her body was half a meter apart from mine and the distance was killing me. "Closer," I whispered._

_She obliged and cuddled up to me. I smelt the scent of her bubblegum shampoo. _

_Not one moment was their regret or denial in my mind. This was completely innocent. My love for her was strong and I knew that if people didn't understand I would make them. By devoting myself to this beautiful blonde._

_"San, are you sleepy?" She asked._

_"Nope. You?" _

_She shook her head against my chest and I tilted her chin up with my fingers. The room was dark but her sapphire blue orbs shone brightly. _

_"I hurt myself in cheerios practice today," She admitted and I could tell she was pouting._

_"Where?" I asked growing concerned._

_"On my forehead. There's a small lump and it hurts a little when I touch it."_

_Without hesitation I leant up and kissed the bruise. She fluttered her eyes closed at the contact and smiled against my skin._

_"Better?"_

_"Mhmm," She mumbled, still feeling the affects of my lips against her skin._

_"Brittany."_

_"Santana," She breathed looking up at me so our line of vision was connected._

_"I'm in love with you," I conffessed strongly._

_"Y-you love me?" She stammered._

_"Yes," I replied simply, scooting closer to her so our lips were inches apart._

_"Because I'm in love with you," She admitted with pride._

_We giggled for a few moments before falling only audible sound were the trees outside the window, brushing against the glass. _

_"Kiss me?" She asked seriously. _

_"I want to," I breathed, leaning in._

_Her lips were soft, tender. Her tongue danced with mine like a couple on their wedding day. She ran her leg up mine causing me to moan. It was embarrassing at the age, especially around the girl you're head over heels for. _

_But Brittany wasn't one to judge, ever. She smirked but then licked my upper lip. Chuckling, Brittany buried herself under the blankets and I followed suit. We sat under there, staring into eachothers eyes with only love. She pulled me closer to our legs were entwined._

_I grazed my fingers along her shirt, waiting for her to allow me to go further. After a simple nod, I lifted the shirt above her head. _

_She then did the same to me and our lips connected once again. _

_She began trailing light kisses up my neck and down my chest. Nothing felt uncomfortable at that moment. Seeing her half naked made me want to wrap my arms around her emitt my body heat onto her. _

_She pushed me back onto the bed, not waiting for a nod that it was okay for her to continue, she already knew that I wanted this. _

_Sliding my shorts and underwear off Brittany haulted. We both had never done this with another girl before and this sex was actually going to mean something to me for the first time. _

_With her inexperience, she started of slow. Rubbing her fingers along my folds so gently. It was teasing but I was afraid for her to go further. _

_I laced my fingers through her hair while she kissed down my stomach. I allowed her to see all of me just like she allowed me into her world without a second thought. _

_As soon as I felt the tip of her tongue on my sex, I knew this was where I'm supposed to be._

* * *

><p>You know those wondrous dreams that feel so real you don't ever want them to end? And when they do end it's always at the best moment. You'd dont know what's going to happen next but you have an idea.<p>

Sometimes real life catches up with you when you don't want it to. And sometimes the worst things happen to the loves of your life. Most times you have to be strong, stronger than you thought you'd ever have to be.

"Santana?" Quinn whispered.

I pricked my head up and opened my eyes.

"I dreamt of her," I muttered.

"Who?" Quinn asked confused. She stood me up and led me towards the entrance of the emergency doors. The doctors hadn't emurged yet, leading me to hope they were just staying by Brittany's side until she relaxed again.

"Brittany," I breathed, smiling faintly.

Quinn sincerely smiled at me, before wrapping her arm around my shoulders. She held me close, but I couldn't feel the warmth in her like I did with Brittany.

Suddenly a doctor appeared and approached us. She had that look in her eyes that told me the worst was about to come.

"She's stable," The doctor said with a small smile.

I ran passed her towards Brittany's room. The length of the hallway felt never ending. My body felt heavy, my heart felt like it could fall from my chest.

As I opened the door Brittany had her eyes closed, breathing peacfully. I moved closer to her, taking every step slow.

I reached her side and slid my fingers along her arm and then clasped onto her hand. To my relief this action didn't transport us anywhere. I was really here and Brittany's really alive.

She faught for me.

* * *

><p><strong>The end. (possible epilogue)<strong>


	7. Epilogue

"Brittany, my water just broke!" Santana was panting so heavily I had to do a doubletake.

"W-what? You mean we-"

"We're having a fucking baby!" Santana squealed and dropped the phone. I took that as my cue to sprint out of the office and head home.

For the past 10 years, I had taken it easy, hoping that my cancer wouldn't come back. So far so good.

Santana and I had been trying for a baby for 5 years. The time went so fast that when Santana finally found out she was pregnant, we both denied it. We had so many interviews with men who just didn't have what we wanted. They were either sleazes or had some saught of STD.

Finally we decided the best option was to turn to a friend.

* * *

><p><em>"You go for Puck."<em>

_"Hey it's Brittana, we have a favour to ask you."_

_"I'll be right there," Puck responded in a seductive tone._

_"Shut up. We want to know if you'll give us your sperm."_

_"Like...sex...with both of you?"_

_"No dumbass, like artificial insemination."_

_"That sounds kinky, I'm in."_

* * *

><p>After trying for so long Santana and I both came to the conclusion that although Puck was a little dimsided, he still was a close friend to both of us. We trusted him.<p>

I arrived at the house in record time, finding Santana being led into her mother's car. When we found out Santana had gotten pregnant we both made the decision to call our families. I had managed to finally reconnect with mine who accepted the fact Santana and I were in love.

Lifting Santana into the backseat, I breathed with her, trying to calm her down.

"It'll all be okay baby, I'm here."

"Easy for you to say!" She screeched.

I tried to stifle the laugh that was bound to leave my mouth at any moment. Seeing Santana like this made me feel for her, but also laugh and smile at the fact that this was the moment we had both been waiting for.

We finally arrived at the hospital and left Mrs. Lopez in the waiting room. I told her to call my parents and within minutes they were in the waiting room aswell.

The doctors layed Santana down on the hospital bed and I faught the tears in my eyes.

Even with the sweat, the messy hair and ragged breaths, Santana still looked beautiful.

The doctor told Santana to push a few times and she obeyed. She tugged on my hand and I happily held hers while she battled with the life that was almost out of her.

Before one last push she looked me in the eyes. There was no pain, no worry, no anger. Just pure love. And it was all for me.

I pressed my forehead to hers and she finally pushed one last time. The doctor held the baby up and I caught a glimpse of the cute little creature before she wrapped it in a blanket.

I cut the ambilical chord and watched while Santana held the little girl in her arms.

"Lucky she doesn't have a mohawk," She laughed.

I tapped her shoulder playfully before stroking the babies cheek lovingly. She was all ours, finally.

* * *

><p>Throughout the next five years, Santana, Valerie and I had been spending a lot of time with our friends. Having dinners with them and finding out that Quinn and Rachel were actually expecting their own child.<p>

Our parents were getting along better than ever and Valerie was growing up faster than I could blink.

Five years had passed. Three of them Santana and I spent raising our baby girl. The other two years, I found myself in a peaceful place, where Santana and our daughter Valerie weren't.

The cancer had come back and this time I didn't fight it. I knew Santana would be okay. She was by my side the whole time once again and told me that she would try and take care of Valerie for the both of us.

I watched over them for two years, seeing Valerie grow up into the most beautiful little girl. She had light brown hair and the prettiest green eyes. Although she inherited most of Santana's gorgeous features, I noticed that she grew faster than Santana as a little girl.

She would hopefully be tall like me. And maybe she'd even remember me when she grows up.

Once christmas morning I saw Santana and Valerie by the tree. My little girl was so excited opening all of her presents. I wish I was there to give her one.

Santana looked just as excited watching Valerie. It was the most beautiful sight I've ever seen.

"What's this?" Santana looked on in confusion at a lone present still nestled under the tree.

Valerie took it in her little hands and held it close to her chest before meeting her gaze with the Latina.

"It's for mommy," She mumbled.

Santana's eyes instantly watered at the thought of our daughter getting a present for me.

I walked over to Santana, sitting down beside her and watching her unwrap the present.

"You and mommy have lots of pictures with ducks," Valerie mentioned, giggling.

Santana smiled sweetly at the little girl and held up the pink duck. "She would've loved it baby," Santana grinned through her tears.

I leaned into Santana's ear, even though she couldn't hear me or see me. I had a feeling she always knew I was watching.

"I love you," I whispered.

Santana closed her eyes and held the duck close to her chest. Valerie crawled forward and cuddled up to her mother in her lap.

Letting out a deep breath and looking towards the sky Santana whispered, "I love you too."

* * *

><p><strong>The end.<strong>


End file.
